Once my anxiety is starts making everything my fault depression gets its cold bony arms around me and holds me tight and I have a hard time getting off my butt. I did manage to get my boys out the door and off to school but then I plonked myself down in my bed, put a cartoon on for R and fell asleep. We had a play date this morning so naturally, I wanted to cancel it and wrap myself in a blanket and sleep until I had to get up but I turned up my ringer and had a 20-minute nap. As soon as my eyes opened I fought the need to just roll over and go back to sleep and went to the washroom. I made my bed and put on pants. Putting on pants, to me is like making a commitment to actually finish getting dressed and doing something. Once I was dressed I made my bed and got ready to go out and meet our friends for a playdate.
Once we go to the park I could tell I won and beat my depression. Its still there and doesn't go away for long but today I won. I freed myself from its cold grip and I was able to have a good morning with friends and my baby boy and we even managed to go buy cupcakes at the farmers market for dessert tonight.
My baby at the park having a blast.